Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Random, random, random. Yes, I said Random.

This hodge-podge mess of a post is random stuff. It's totally unrelated jibberish, but what the hey. . .

We got a new play structure. YEAH!!

I've been wanting to get a new play structure for the kids for years, but have stalled on the whopping, rip-your-heart-out, suck you dry, leave you in poverty price they want for them at Costco. LUCKILY . . . a friend of ours did not want theirs any more and gave us one!! So what is old is new again!

I am really glad to be able to recycle this great playground and give it a new life.


The kids totally hate the thing.

They are just miserable playing on the tandem swing.

Just kidding!!!!

The kids are near brawling over this swing they love it so much. But from the looks on their faces you'd never guess they were quarreling only moments before.

How can one kid be so happy? I'm in awe. Pure unadulterated joy is hard to find. I think Wyatt can claim the title of happiest kid in town.

Our Menagerie Grows.

Meet the newest member of our always amazing family. I introduce "Doggie" to you.

Note the jump rope "leash" attached to a common household step stool. How a plastic stool becomes a dog I will never know, but Ella has been dragging this plastic stool around the house calling it her "DOG."


I was sitting in the kitchen with SIL Suzi and nephew Luke while Ella pulled "her dog" across the linoleum making a rather obscene noise most comparable to some rude form of a flatulence.

Luke chimes in, "Hey Ella, your dog sounds like he farts a lot." We all giggled and laughed a his ass-tute observation.

But Ella's quick reply in her high pitch toddler voice, "Doggie can fart morning, noon and night," put us in stitches as she chortled down the hall way with doggie in tow, farting.

Where did she learn that phrase? Where!!!

Much too much information.

I wear cotton jockey underwear. I love them. They give full coverage to my hind end. I can't stand anything going up my buttock. You can keep your butt floss and skimpy underwear. They just aren't comfortable.

But what is all this underwear talk about?

Well, I was going to the bathroom the other day (at the end of the day) and I noticed I was wearing my underwear inside out. This has never happened before that I can recall.

Basically, I wore my underwear inside out all day long and did not notice.

I attribute it to the fact that comfortable cotton underwear looks almost the same from either direction. Getting dressed in a hurry in darkish conditions could cause this random miss application of my undergarment. Right? Right!

Tell me someone has worn their underwear inside out before beside me. . .

Or I'm gonna have to go to inside out underwear anonymous over this incident. I think I may suffer permanently psychological damage over this one.

More Bathroom Humor


More on Ella. My big girl, independent daughter, sassy pants, lady-girl has been wiping her own butt for many months. I am proud of the fact that I am no longer responsible for either of my children's potty hygiene . . .

However, today I hear her voice call me from the bowels of the bathroom where she asked, "Mom! Mom! Come wipe my butt."

The only sensible response was a flat refusal. "No Ella. No way!" I replied. "We're not going backward here."

Then from the bathroom she calls back, "I want to go backwards. Mom. I'll pay you 100 dollars to wipe my butt!"

I. Am. Not. Kidding.

File This Under Old Things that Should be Thrown Away.

I can NOT throw out these ratty jeans. Why do they have to disintegrate on me? Oh why do my favorite jeans always succumb to entropy?


My Cat Should be Arrested for his Obscene Behavior.

There is cat love.

(put on your best Barry White voice)

And there is cat LOVE.

"Get a room."

A Parting Note.

Two headed monsters really exist.

That's all folks!


Doris Sturm said...

He, he, he, that photo of your hubby sleeping innocently while the cat's straddling him - and his words: "we do not need another cat" come to mind - I can see why (ha, ha, ha)...

You should definitely frame those faces of Ella and Wyatt laughing on the swing - they both look obliviously happy!

I've never seen a double sided swing like that - I want one! I think they ought to make an adult sized model and put in on a big business complex, so when the two high-powered, stressed execs don't agree and are stubbornly babyish about insisting on them being right, just make them both sit on that swing and swing 'em high till thei laugh like your kids...give them the "forced happy treatment"...heck, we're all but kids inside only the playground's gotten bigger and the toys are more expensive...what a nice post and where in the world does Ella stash her 100 bucks? MOREOVER, where did she get it? (he, he, he)

Doris Sturm said...

p.s. Julia - just put a couple of thos iron-on patches on your jeans and you're good to go for another few years ;-)

Jean said...

A very enjoyable read with cute pictures. In many ways you are rich!

Melodie said...

Haha! The whole underwear thing..yep,I have done that many times! In fact,it doesn't stop there,when I got up this morning and had a cup of coffee I noticed my pajama bottoms were on inside out...I think being a mom causes loss of brain cells or something,lol!

IanH said...

Julia, great photos! I'm glad to see that your illness is over and done with.

lee said...

Yes, underwear inside out more than once. And NOT during a walk of shame.

Julie Harward said...

Oh where oh where do I begin?! I love random posts, it's like watching the news. You are so going to miss them when they are grown up and gone! What sweet entertainment they are. Families that can talk about anything are...FUN! Thanks for sharing it all. Gotta love that Ella LOL Come say hi :D

Sara said...

The cat picture had me laughing so hard!!! hahahah!

Love the random post.

The playset looks amazing.

Ella is hysterical!!!

I have done the underwear thing. In fact, I almost blogged about my current underwear issue...I put on three pairs today and ripped all three of them. I need new underwear.

My kids still can't wipe their butts. This morning James asked me "Do they have alarms at school that go off when a kid puts his finger in his butt?". I really didn't want to know the source of that question.

Man, you wear your jeans hard! Mine always fray at the cuffs, rarely the knees.

Leigh said...

Julia, as always you crack me up! And please don't go into hiding about wearing your underwear inside out. I've done it, hubby's done it, kids have done it...and if anyone laughing at you saying they've NEVER done it...well, they've just gotta be lyin'. Right?

Julia said...

I am so glad that there are many members of the "Inside out underwear" club. Phew.

Mel said...

You crack me up! I wore my underwear inside out the other day and realized at work--halfway through my day. I don't think that's happened since college...

My 3 year old ties his "lead rope" (bungie cord) to all sorts of things and calls them horses.

The Mind of a Mom said...

I love their new play climber that is so nice of your friend I saw them at Costco here and was blown away by the price. I am going to fess-up, I have the same undies problem. On more then one occasion I have done the exact same thing. Good to know I am not in this alone!

Ms Snarky Pants said...

We're going to get one of the play sets with a swing like that. And by we I mean my mom and dad are going to buy it for the boys as a combined birthday Christmas present for both of them. hehe We just have to somehow make a flat area.... Gonna need a bulldozer... Anyway I was really wondering about those tandem swings. To me they don't look all that fun, but clearly I am mistaken!

And I do know someone who wears those same undies who has not only worn them inside out but she had the leg hole around her waist... Names have been withheld to prevent my from being whopped. hehe

Julia said...

Oh Ms Snarky Pants. Bwahhaaabwahhhhaaaa.
Laughing my gut off at that one.

DayPhoto said...

I enjoyed this whole post! Good Job.


Suzi said...

All your randomness put a smile on my face.

Vixen/Apron Frenzy said...

You certainly brought a smile to my face with this post. I know two little girls who will definitely want to stop by and try out the new tandem swing when we come up this summer!

And I have never, never, never found out at night must before bed that I have been wearing my underwear inside out all day. Never.

Holly, the Old Western Gal said...

One of my cats lays like that on me, too. Then he sinks his nasty fangs into me out of the blue. He's mental.

The post is random, so the comment will be random. The kids are so cute in their transports of joy over the swing!

Julia, it's okay you wore the undies inside out. At least you WORE them. It COULD have been worse, especially with those peek-a-boo jeans.

Anonymous said...

julia- don't you recognize that line "farts morning, noon and night"... it's "Walter the Farting Dog"! I'm pretty sure... That Ella remembers everything- you might regret that some day!

Tell Ella I miss her and I'll wipe her butt for $50. :)

Julia said...

Thank YOU Rose for remembering this OBVIOUS quote... :)

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