A couple days ago I was staring up my beanstalks deciding which one I could climb to the land in the clouds.
I was thinking the clouds were looking kind of sketchy to be walking around in, but decided I had to go through with the visit. I mean if you find magic beans you have to use them properly.
Choosing this one, I began my assent up the not-so-stout vine stems. I had no idea what I would find up there....probably ogres and the like, maybe gold, well at least I was hoping so.
It was a long struggling climb and I was dreadfully tired at the end, but I made it to the top and found solid ground up in what appeared to be see through clouds. How do they do that???
I started walking around and found some trees that were being water with a garden hose. The giant must have forgot the water on since it was all mushy around the base of the tree. Then I found this frog flooded out of his home.
Seeing how he might be a prince charming who needs rescuing I decided to kiss him and try to break the evil witch's wicked spell. I gave him a "Sssssmack!" Right on the kisser.
Oh, yeah... I should have known. He was just a toad. A western toad. Then he told me his name was Bufo Boreas and that he was actually the King of Bug Eating. Well now I can say I've kissed a King. Haa haa.
I looked around for the alleged treasures that are supposed to be up there and stumbled upon these large elliptical fruit. They were gigantic and so I could not feasibly carry them down the beanstalk. Drat!
I was wondering if I would find anything of value up there in the clouds and wandered around for a few minutes more. I certainly did not want to end up the entree for the giant. I was getting the feeling that my time was running out.
Then I heard some screaming and turned and saw this:
Three dwarfs were barreling down on me in their vehicles of destruction. One got pretty close and I could see it's sharp teeth and claws. I started to get scared at that point.
I hear these small dwarfs are fierce fighters and eat humans. I gotta run folks. Wish me luck going down that bean stalk. Too bad there was no treasure today...