Saturday, February 21, 2009

Terror in The Cemetery

The two young girls were running with every ounce of speed that their 12 and 14 year old bodies could muster. They were breathing so heavily that screams were impossible as they ran across the gravestones which were flush with the carefully manicured lawn in the cemetery. Reaching the end of the grass, they bolted across a dirt field like two fillies chased by a ghostly Beucephalus with nostrils engulfed in flames.

Their safe haven was in sight. The small wooden shed located at the bottom corner of the field, west of the cemetery, would shelter them from him. They flew into the dusty one roomed building and slammed the door shut, bolting it quickly. Heaving with burning lungs, they bent over sucking in huge gulps of air and waited.

A few hundred feet behind the panicked girls was a furious boy, approximately 11 years in age. The little red-haired, freckle-faced demon ran determinedly after them, brandishing a huge carving knife while screaming a war cry. He meant to do some harm of one kind or another.

He cleared the neatly organized gravestones and crossed the dried grass field in a b-line for the shed. He was determined to get his revenge. As he approached the little shack that housed the girls, he screamed and cried in anger. Then repeatedly stabbing the door, with an over-the-head ax-murderer attack, the boy vented his frustration on the wooden barrier between he and the girls.

Meanwhile, they were cowering inside the creepy shed listening to the bludgeoning coming from outside. Why was this brutal attack from a mere child occurring? I don't really remember what specifically provoked it. Yes, that was me inside the shed. That is, me and Julie, my husband Mike's older sister. The shed was spooky enough by it's self and the kid yelling for blood outside was no more comforting. When would the attack end and when could we get out of there?

Sadly, I don't recall just how everything unraveled. It was a eternity ago in dragonfly time. I lived to see another day. Obviously.

You see, this is my first memory of my husband-to-be. Lovely is it not?

Somehow, we aggravated that little boy, my future husband, to the point he wanted to kill us. Literally kill us. Recollection of the events makes me think Julie was the primary instigator. I was extremely shy and not one to start a fight, so I could not possibly have been responsible for igniting the display of rage I have just described. I think I was simply a willing accomplice to the alleged torment.

However, should I have taken this as some warning sign? They say that love is blind. Or just plain stupid in some cases... So was I influenced to marry him 21 years later out of fear for my life or just plain love? Again, I'm not dead yet.

These days Mike's temper is under control and he does not chase me around our property with over-sized cutlery. So, why gentle reader have I provided this quaint and heartfelt tale of love and affection?

This chronicle is to commemorate the celebration of my 5th wedding anniversary with my dear and loving spouse. Today we have been married 5 years. Cumulatively, we have been a couple for slightly over 12 years. Debbie at Suburb Sanity inspired me with her story on how she met her spouse; and I thought that my first memory of Mike would be a touching way to acknowledge our union.

After a long engagement period of 7 years, Mike and I got married in a quiet elopement in Monterrey, California. That is after he trapped me. Yep, you guessed it, I became a "little" pregnant. We (I) decided that we had to be married as to not give his parents an early heart attack or some other unspecified conniption fit. His family would not handle the thought of a child out of wedlock well. They're kind of old fashioned that way. Because we were already the "bad seeds" and shacked up, we had to become legal and make our union official.

My relationship with Mike and his family spans back many years to my early adolescence when I was a gawky 12 yr old in 8th grade who wanted to have a horse. I bought, Candy Bar, a buckskin quarter horse from Mike's mom back when satin dolphin shorts, polo shirts, and top sider shoes were really popular. Hence, Mike and I knew of each other since we were kids. And I use the term"knew" rather loosely here since I was friends with my mother-in-law before I even had a glimmer of her son as my future husband. I used to have sleep overs with Mike's older sister, Julie, and keep my horse at their house. Julie and I rode our horses through the hills like wild she-women well before I ever thought of him as anything more than just her bratty little brother, Maniac Mike, who chased us with a butcher's knife. Any thoughts beyond that of would not occur for at least a decade later.

And about the cemetery...Mike's dad was the on-grounds manager of a large Catholic cemetery that was surrounded by 120 acres of open space. They lived in a 100-year old Victorian near the cemetery grounds. But that is the stuff for another story here on Our Simple Life.

Happy Anniversary Micheal!

15 Comments for OSL:

Suzi said...

Awww, that was nice, despite the terror that let to you married bliss. I have heard that story many times and NEVER tire of it. Now I know where boy #2 get his rage. And yes, those are the cookies you have been raiding from my cookie jar.

Suzi said...

Oh, by the way, Happy Anniversary! Let me know when you need me this evening so you and Mike can go to dinner.

Debbie said...

What a great tale! I can't imagine meeting my spouse at such an early age. Of course, it did take you all a little time to get hitched:)
Happy anniversary. I hope you have a wonderful day.

Mammatalk said...

Now, that's the best "how I met my hubby" story I have ever heard! Brave woman!

Tink said...

Happy Anniversary. What a great story you should write books.

Nicole said...

Great story--one that your children will love to hear over and over as they get older :) Happy anniversary!

Amanda said...

Wow what a great story!
Having met at such a young age.

I hope you both enoyed a lovely anniversary!

So Not Mom-a-licious said...

Happy Lipstick Lovin' Day!!!!

Mountain Woman said...

What a fantastic story and happy anniversary! It's certainly a unique way to meet your future husband and I'm sure glad he didn't kill you and you lived to tell the tale. I've come to know Mike through your posts and your photos and you two have more than a "simple life." You always sound like you're having so much fun and lots of laughs from lasagna to the man breasts (my personal favorite). It sure would be interesting to have Mike write his account of your first meeting.
Here's to many more happy years of marriage!

DiPaola Momma said...

I think there is something to the "annoyed at first site" that runs deeper than that whole love poohie! I couldn't STAND the obnoxious-self-involved-concieted new guy from Brooklyn NY in our southern California office. I'd always had an deep seeded hate for New Yorkers.. I hate the freakin' Yankees, the accent is like chalk screetching on a blackboard, and the bravado was like limburger cheese..it simply stunk!

We were rude to eachother, made jokes at one and other's expense and were generaly just bad sports.. now I get freaked out and depressed when he has to be gone over night. I can't wait for him to walk through the door every day. And it keeps getting worse.. like an infection.. 10 years now and I love him more (there must be something wrong huh?!)

Loved the story... Sorry it took me so long to get to it!! I'm adding this blog to my roll so I don't miss out!

blueviolet said...

Happy Anniversary! I'm pretty sure nobody can ever top that story! Holy cow!

Grand Pooba said...

Oh my god, that is quite the story! I can't believe you ended marrying that lil boy! I'm glad his temper has calmed in his adult years!

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fidget said...

uhhh wow, what an introduction huh?

Mammatalk said...

Just stopping by for a quick High Five while on my Blog Jog! Couldn't skip you!!